


love letter

by neverwantedtodance



Category: Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Aqours, Ambiguous Relationships, F/F, Love Confessions, Possibly Unrequited Love, adventures in crippling loneliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 14:44:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13125861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neverwantedtodance/pseuds/neverwantedtodance
Summary: It’s more than a simple piece of paper, Kanan knows. She’s gotten enough love letters in the past to recognise a confession.





	love letter

**Author's Note:**

> started this fic last month and rescued it from my drafts today
> 
> i hope you all enjoy :)

Kanan blinks as she stares at the girl in front of her. She can’t really get a good look at her face, as she’s bent almost double, presenting the piece of paper to Kanan. It’s more than a simple piece of paper, Kanan knows. She’s gotten enough love letters in the past to recognise a confession.

The girl has red hair tied in pigtails and a yellow ribbon round her neck. First year, then. Kanan doesn’t know her name but she takes the letter anyway, noticing while she does that the girl’s hand is shaking slightly. Her nervousness is endearing.

The girl says nothing but looks up at her, aquamarine eyes desperately peering up at Kanan through locks of hair. This usually means they want her to read it. Kanan holds back a sigh and opens up the paper. It’s slightly pink and smells like strawberries.

_To Matsuura-senpai,_

_I’ve always admired you from afar, and my admiration became love over time. I love you, Matsuura-senpai. Please accept my confession!_

_From_

_Kurosawa Ruby_

_Class 1-2_

Short and sweet. Not too weepy. Just the way Kanan likes them. She realises Kurosawa is still standing there, her face blushing a deep red.

Here comes the worst part.

“Kurosawa-san-”

“Yes!”

She blinks. She’s unusually optimistic.

She smiles at the younger girl. “Thank you for your letter. I’m very flattered, but …” She steels herself when Kurosawa’s face falls. “I can’t accept your confession. I’m really sorry.”

She closes her eyes so she doesn't have to see the disappointment on her face. This is the worst part. Knowing that she’s made a stranger so miserable. To all the girls who confess to her though, she isn’t a stranger. She’s the great love of their lives who they’ll forget about as soon as the year is out. Being the only person that’s aware of the fact is still exhausting.

“Why?”

She’s jolted out of her thoughts by a voice. She opens her eyes. Kurosawa is still stood there. Her voice is weak and there are tears brimming in her eyes, but she still manages to look Kanan in the eye.

“Why?” Kanan repeats. She’s used to the girls running away crying. Kurosawa seems to be cut from a different cloth than the rest of them. She finds herself, briefly, for just a moment, slightly impressed.

She nods. “Why can’t you accept my confession, M-Matsuura-senpai?” She stammers slightly, her blush becoming even more pronounced.

Kanan breathes in, then out. “I’m sure you’re very nice, Kurosawa-san. But I don’t know you at all. How can I accept your confession when I don’t know anything about you? I’m sorry.”

Kurosawa’s brow furrows, and then she opens her mouth as if to speak, but shuts it and turns away.

“Thank you,” she says under her breath, and then leaves.

Kanan remains stood, leaning against the wall. No girl has ever confessed to her like that before. Although she was short and weak and shy, there was something strong and resilient about her.

Kanan heads home for the day, Kurosawa’s letter still clutched in her hand, haunted by the scent of strawberries all the way

* * *

A flash of red from the beginning of the drinks aisle catches her eye in the mart, and Kanan’s curiosity is piqued. There aren’t that many people in Uchiura with hair the colour of strawberries, after all. She puts down the snacks she was looking at and changes direction.

Kurosawa is standing on her tiptoes, looking at a stack of strawberry flavoured aloe drinks. Kanan wrinkles her nose. That stuff always tastes too sweet for her liking.

“Kurosawa-san,” she calls, and the girl lets out an undignified shriek. Thankfully, she doesn’t knock over the drinks tower.

“S-senpai! I didn’t expect to see you here!” Her face is hopeful, her eyes wide. Truthfully, Kanan shouldn’t have come and got her hopes up, but she somehow couldn’t help but want to talk to the girl again.

“We do live in the same town, you know,” Kanan says. She glances at bottle in her hand.

“Are you sure you want a cold drink? It’s really cold outside.”

“I’m fine,” Ruby says, a sweet smile on her face. Everything about this girl was sweet, Kanan’s noticing. It’s a little overwhelming.

Kanan shrugs. “If you say so,” she replies, and heads over to look at the sports drinks. Since she’ll be running later, she picks up an energy drink. Kurosawa trots hopefully beside her, observing what Kanan is buying. A voice is Kanan’s head is screaming, wondering what she’s even doing here.

“Kurosawa - ” she begins, before she’s cut off.

“You can call me Ruby,” she says. Kanan raises one eyebrow. Ruby swallows. “Senpai.”

“Ruby,” Kanan tries the name out, rolling the syllables around in her mind. It’s like she can taste the words on her tongue when she speaks. Predictably and yet irrationally, they taste like strawberries.

“Would you like me to pay for your drink?” she asks. By the look on Ruby’s face, she might as well have asked the girl to marry her.

She pays for their drinks in silence and they head out into the crisp winter air. Even though it’s still early afternoon, the sky is darkening and there’s a chill in the air.

“Thank you, Senpai,” Ruby says, smiling up at Kanan again. Kanan feels her heart twist.

“No problem,” she replies, staring into the distance.

There’s silence again.

After a while, Ruby speaks. “I meant what I wrote. I really love - ”

“Don’t say it,” Kanan bites out, interrupting her.

“Why not?” Ruby fires back. “Why shouldn’t I tell you my feelings? You think they’re fake but you don’t know anything about me!”

“That’s exactly the point!” Kanan can feel her temper rising. If she’s not careful, she’ll lose it.

“I don’t know anything about you, and you don’t know anything about me! How can you say you love me when you’ve never even had a conversation with me in your entire life?”

“I’ve been watching you, Senpai.”

“That’s more than a little bit creepy,” Kanan says, running a hand through her hair.

Ruby blushes, but continues. “I know you’re pretty, and smart, and k-kind, and you always try to help people no matter what. I know you get scared when you’re tidying the classroom late at night and it’s dark.”

It’s Kanan’s turn to blush now. Her guard down, Ruby reaches out to clasp her hand.

“You’re not as tough as you think you are.” Ruby’s cheeks are almost as red as her name, with embarrassment and adrenaline but also the cold. Her fingers are like ice and there’s a determined look in her eyes. Kanan fights away a smile.

“I think you’re not as weak as you believe you are, Ruby.”

“That’s why I lo-like you, Senpai. You’re so k-kind.”

Kanan notices she’s shivering now with the cold as well. She huffs.

“I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but do you want to come back to my place?”

Ruby’s eyes light up, as Kanan turns away and starts to walk. She hurries to keep up with her pace.

“It’s only because you look like you’re going to freeze to death,” Kanan states. Ruby smiles knowingly.

They’re still holding hands.

* * *

Kanan closes the door behind them. “Make yourself comfortable. I’ll turn the heating up.”

“Thank you,” Ruby says in a quiet voice. She looks so small in Kanan’s narrow hallway.

She follows Kanan into the kitchen, and then into the living room. When Kanan turns around to close the door she bumps straight into Ruby, who lets out some kind of demonic shriek.

Kanan sighs. “Let’s sit.”

Ruby sits daintily, legs crossed. Kanan sprawls slightly, then feels rude and sits up. Ruby giggles softly.

“Sit however you want, Senpai. It’s your house, after all.” She looks down at her knees.

Kanan slouches again. This way, she can look up at Ruby. Her skin is pale and smooth, with a few freckles on her neck.

 _She’s really cute_ , Kanan realises suddenly. She turns her head away quickly.

“You can stare if you want,” Ruby says quietly.

Kanan raises an eyebrow. “Where did this confidence come from?”

Ruby blushes again. “I want you to look at me,” she admits.

Kanan curses under her breath. “If you keep saying stuff like that -”

“- It’s because I love you -”

“Stop saying that!” Kanan shouts. She sits up, hands gripping her knees. “I’m sick of hearing that stupid phrase.”

Ruby stares at her inquiringly, but doesn’t say anything.

“I’ve lost track of the number of people that have told me that. But they never mean it,” Kanan says softly. “It’s never real. I just want … ”

Ruby reaches across, her fingers brushing Kanan’s. The touch is feather-light, almost as if it’s not even there. Ruby is so delicate, yet strong at the same time. Kanan doesn’t quite know what to think about her.

“My feelings are real, Senpai,” she says, her voice soft and soothing. Kanan almost wants to believe her.

As if Ruby can read her mind, she says, “Please believe me. You don’t have to say you love me, or you like me. But I want to try … ”

She’s coming closer and closer to Kanan, her breath mingling with Kanan’s own. Her perfume, strangely, doesn’t smell like strawberries. She smells like honey, still sweet but not overwhelming.

“You don’t smell like strawberries,” Kanan murmurs, inching closer to Ruby.

Ruby’s nose scrunches. Even her confusion was cute. “What?”

“I was expecting you to smell like strawberries.”

Ruby’s touch on her becomes harder, firmer, _real_. Her hand rests comfortably on Kanan’s knee as Kanan’s hand comes up to ghost her cheekbones.

Ruby’s giggles softly. “You smell like sea salt, and chocolate.”

“Ruby, before we … I don’t love you. I’m sorry.”

Ruby shakes her head smiling. “That’s okay. For now, this is … good.”

“I’m willing to try. It’s because it’s never real, and I’m …”

“Lonely?”

“Yes. I don’t want to hurt you. But I want to try … with you.”

“That’s fine, Senpai. That’s what I want …”

When Kanan finally leans over and kisses her, she tastes like strawberries. Ruby’s hand is in her hair, softly running through the strands. The room is growing warmer and warmer, but Kanan doesn’t care.

Whatever she feels, whatever Ruby feels, doesn’t matter.

This is real, and for now that’s all they both need.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm lonely so naturally i projected my feelings onto an anime character and wrote a fanfic
> 
> anyway i hope you all enjoyed this, if you did please leave comments and kudos bc i really appreciate feedback!
> 
> p.s. can you believe i finally wrote a fic set in winter lmao  
> i like playing with the seasons, i feel like they kinda affect the mood of the fic and the pairing  
> and there are certain pairings i associate with summer (diamari / chikamari) and winter (yoshidia / kananruby / leahruby)  
> idk if anyone else feels like this lol  
> ok bye


End file.
